So You Want To Be A Waiter

The best book on waiting tables that you have never read – yet

Monthly Archives: July 2011

So, have you been doing your uniform checks without me bugging you?

Tell the truth. You haven’t have you?

Time to look at those shirts, pants, aprons, jackets and shoes.  Just because I haven’t been around doesn’t mean that you can let yourself go. You know that mom doesn’t give me visitation very often.  Still, never forget that your mom and I love you very much and that it wasn’t your fault that I can’t see you very often.

Love ya much.


A wine tragedy

$1m of Mollydooker Wines 2010 Velvet Glove Shiraz lost in forklift crash

  • By Tim Dornin
  • From: AAP
  • July 22, 2011 3:17PM

A MCLAREN Vale wine maker says he’s “gut-wrenched, shocked and numb” after losing more than $1 million of his flagship shiraz when a container crashed from a forklift.

Mollydooker Wines‘ 2010 Velvet Glove Shiraz sells for $185 a bottle, but now winemaker Sparky Marquis has lost a third of his production after the mishap which destroyed all but one of the 462 cases bound for the US.

As the container hit the ground the force of 12 tonnes crushed the cartons, reducing many to a third of their normal size.

“It was unbelievable, crazy. It was not what I wanted to hear,” Mr Marquis said.

“When they opened up the container they said it was like a murder scene.

“There was red everywhere.

“But it smelled phenomenal. They were really impressed with the smell.”

Read the rest of the article here:

Sarah and Sparky Marquis lost a container of $185-a-bottle 2010 Velvet Glove Shiraz. Picture: James Elsby Source: The Advertiser

An incredible loss. I hope the forklift operator wasn’t sneaking hits of The Boxer while trying to operate the lift.

All but one case meant for the US destroyed. Sob. Now that’s a left hook!

From, Masters’ champion mistaken for waiter



When they thought Schwartzel was a waiter

Masters winner reveals his embarrassing moment

Posted: 2 June 2011
by Golfmagic

Charl Schwartzel has revealed a case of mistaken identity when he attended the European Tour’s Players awards night at the Soffitel Hotel near Heathrow last week.

The South African joined reigning major champions Graeme McDowell, Louis Oosthuizen and Martin Kaymer on stage for an historic photograph, proudly wearing his Augusta National Golf Club green jacket – all four being members of the European Tour and playing in the BMW PGA Championship.

It was a black tie affair but Schwartzel was the only guest not wearing the apppropriate dress code.

“The staff at the hotel were a little alarmed. They thought I was a waiter!” Schwartzel revealed at this week’s US PGA Tour event – The Memorial in Ohio.

He also explained that for the ten months up until his Masters defence next April, he can wear the jacket whenever he likes. After that Augusta protocol demands he’s officially only allowed to wear it around the Georgia club’s premises.

“I can take it pretty much with me everywhere,” he said. “If you get to keep it only for a year, you’ve got to enjoy it.”

Read more:

Yep, looks like a waiter to me. Or, more accurately, a  maitre d‘ from a cheesy Catskills hotel.